Greetings you loyal filth and chunks of offal. My what a long time it's been since your last piece of gospel. Nameless intern #4775 is off right now, tending to a mighty head wound I produced upon him. I am the Prophet Blorngies. I will be your bringer of knowledge and sadness until Nameless Intern #4775 recovers/dies. I look forward to bombarding you with my beliefs and tales of whimsey. May strife and bitter discontent be with you.
- The Prophet Blorngies
All hail blorngies
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